Death by Treadmil

I run, I live, I run....

This morning, due to the weather I had to run on a treadmill, in the gym. This is not my normal routine as I get very bored, very quick due to the lack of things to look at and divert my attention. But being the dedicated runner, aka Flo, that I am, I went to the gym to continue in the training.

I was in full speed and became thirsty, now I cannot multitask when running and therefore needed to slow down. I did so, sipped my water and attempted to begin back on my running pace. Somehow I missed a step and fell to my knee! My life flashed before my eyes, I thought about who was in the room and could save me once I was sucked under the treadmill and whipped around and around while the belt feverishly continued on the runners pace. I heard someone gasp with horror as I took the plunge and was pushed back by the high speed belt! All of a sudden I was on my side wondering if anyone saw me. I hoped that a hole would swallow me up and whisk me away, or better yet, a time machine would transport me back 13 seconds I could do it all over again. I would have never stopped for water, I would have just kept going like Flo did!

People saw. I have treadmill knee burn. Running is indeed a dangerous sport. But like Flo I kept on going. True Story.

Maybe its me...

But here is what I don't get, we all have to work, and none of us actually want to. I get that.

What I don't get is that since we all have to face this dooming reality, why wouldn't we want to DO everything in our power to work as much as possible now so we can do as little as possible later?! I mean lets get serious people. Your winning smile isn't paying the rent.

So lets review, if it snows 1 inch, you have to come to work. If it rains, you have to come to work. If it is sunny, you have to come to work. Who calls out because of weather. We do not live in a part of the country that has tornados or earthquakes (thank goodness) and we should be able to handle the change in weather and all that it brings!

I suppose that maybe I might have a false sense of reality and have more of a work ethic than most and this is why I get so annoyed. Plus I am the only who has to then figure out how to resolve the issues that will arise once you are not here.

So do me a favor, do not apply if you cannot handle the weather!

dont tell me

I have been doing what I do for a long time. And I know I do not know everything, but I know a lot. This is what gets me through the day without murdering people and wanting to strangle them!

Needless to say, when someone fresh off the block trys to run their mouth and tell me I do not know what I am talking about, it pisses me off.

I do not care how you run your business, I follow the polices and play by most of the rules, which in turn keeps me:

1. Ahead of the game
2. Out of trouble
3. Better than you

Why? Because you all drop like flies and I am still here. I have figured out the perfect balance to make everyone happy, some of the time and that is A-Okay with me!

So do me a favor, don't steal clients because you can not get them yourself. Its tacky. And that gets you no where in life.

Just so you know.....

once a complainer - always a complainer

Dear Person of Interest;

If you choose to complain about everything, then no one will take you seriously. Its hot outside, hence our air conditioning being on. If you are cold in A/C bring a sweater. We cannot make everyone happy regarding the air output within our building and I am comfortable knowing that the general consensus is perfectly comfortable. I will not sweat out everyone else for just you.

So seriously, do me and more importantly yourself, a favor and bring a long sleeved top. This will eliminate your current issue.

I anticipate having another issue from you shortly. As you are just that kinda person. It must be exhausting!

Regards;
The Air Con Police!

Call me Flo

I touched on the running... and lets really discuss what I am going for here... I am eagerly anticipating the day you can call me Flo Joyner. Circa 1988 she was winning Gold medals, I was making mud pies. She was the fastest woman in the world, I was reading out loud to my fellow students in my 3rd grade class. She created the 'one-legger' running outfit, I wore my hair in a side pony tail. You can obviously see what we had in common!

At the Olympics, she painted three of her fingernails red, white and blue, and she painted a fourth gold to signify her goal of winning a gold medal. I too shall paint my nails and run like the wind to the finish line of the half marathon in Vegas. I can smell the sweet scent of the finish line and can tell you that the 'one legger' I wear will be outstanding!

Stay tuned...

The running saga...

I have decided to run a half marathon. I was not a runner before, but I mean, why not go for the gusto!

We will be adding a half mile each week to prepare for the 13 that await us in.............. LAS VEGAS!

Now you see why I want to run. Why I NEED to run. Vegas is calling....

Week 1 had a lot of bumps in the road. I needed to purchase new sneakers and verbally attacked everyone and anything in my way. It was not a happy week. I was sore, I was tired. I even worked out with my trainer on the same day I would run.

Well, those days are over. I almost died on the treadmill last week, and have since decided to separate training sessions and running. It is for my own safety and the safety of my trainer. As I almost beat her to death. Not that it was her fault, although I will place the blame... I couldn't catch my breath and then went into panic mode and seriously almost cried in the gym. Like in front of people. I held back but it was rough!!!!

Week 2, 2 miles. argh. Still tired. But accomplished a lot!I ran 1.5 miles consistently without stopping to walk. This is big strides... Soon you will be calling me Flo.

Now, week 3 has begun!

The scene: 6am. I am tried and I just woke up. I am getting dressed for my morning run of 3 miles and I am wishing that I could go back to sleep. I know that I must get this over with as the later the day gets I will make an excuse, maybe. I really want to kick my husband as he lies soundly in the bed, snoring. Not because he did anything, but just because he is still sleeping. I refrain from doing so, as I would not appreciate waking up to a kick. He is lucky, today!

I meet my running partner at the park. I have mapped out 3 miles and the only exciting thing is that it is a new route. There are actually more people at the park at this awful hour than at 8am when we go. I notice that people are actually friendly at the park at 7am. They smile, they say hello. It is not what I am used to. Living in Northern NJ, we generally do not speak to one another unless we are starting an argument, or have just gotten into a fender bender. So this is all foreign and somewhat alien like to me. But in my attempt to be one with the other runners, I go with it and 'smile and say hello with friendliness' which is what my job has taught me to do as one of our service essentials!

We walk to warm up and then the run begins...... 2 miles into it, I want to lay down and cry. I think to myself:

How am I going to do 13 of these things?
How does my cousin run 100 miles? She is obviously crazy... I must finish. And I did. I finished!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, 2 hours later, my legs are tired. All I can think of is, I finished and I do not have to think about running for another 24 hours! Rest time...

How do I rate.

Tomorrow I start an epic journey. I will go places that I have never been. See things I thought I would never see. All the while in... sneakers. I am going to run. Outside. Inside. On a very regular basis. I am committed to running 4-5 days a week. I am committed to running a half marathon. Makes sense right? I was barely able to complete the one mile run in 8th grade, why not run 13 miles next time I decide to do something athletic.

I mean, when not in shape, take the bulls by the horn and make him your b***h. I am going to run, I am going to run so much that I can justifiably get the sneakers that count your steps and coordinate with a watch... I will be wearing t-shirts with various 'races' on. I will be supporting a cause just to say I finished something. Why not. I have never done anything so athletic in my life and I am pretty sure that I am more excited about working out and running than I have been about anything in my life. By anything I mean exercise. I have been very excited about shoes, cocktails, vacations, a good eyebrow shape, etc.

Exercise has been my forgotten, long lost sister. I didn't know her. I didn't know who she was or where she lived... I didn't know where to send my holiday cards but I also never received them. We have been reunited and as I get to know her, I will keep our progress as a team visible so that I can see where I have come from and where I am headed. For me. As I am sure no one else gives a sh*t.